


angelic

by brandywine421



Series: UYL Thursdays [2]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, F/M, Friendship, Gen, M/M, Wingfic
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-01-20
Updated: 2016-06-04
Packaged: 2018-05-15 02:08:24
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 15,488
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5767210
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/brandywine421/pseuds/brandywine421
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"This is obviously because of your vita-rays, none of the other subjects had this reaction!" Dr. Erskine protested.</p><p>"I think I need to see a mirror," Steve said under his breath so Peggy could hear him.  "How bad is it?"</p><p>"It's not - it's - Steven, are you religious?"</p><p>He didn't know why that mattered right now but something tickled his bare back and he turned and saw something - something - was growing out of his back.  "Shit!"  He jerked and - fuck - his wings fluttered and spread in surprise, knocking probably expensive equipment to the floor as he tried to see.</p><p>"Fuck Hydra, I'm not messing with that," a voice said and a man dropped a gun and stalked out of the room.  It took a moment too long for the soldiers to dart out after him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is part of my continued 'Unfuck Your Life' plan as referenced in the first story in this series.
> 
> Chapter 3 will be up on (real) Thursday. (Chapter count may change as I split the parts up.)

The first thing he noticed when he the chamber opened was the color.  His fingers almost twitched to get at the box of colored pencils he'd stuffed in his bag.  He took a breath and filled his lungs and wow, wasn't that great, and he was taller than everyone else in the room.  
  
Dr. Erskine's eyes went wide.  Howard incorrectly made the sign of the cross.  One of the technicians tossed down a clipboard and stomped out of the room.  
  
God, was he a monster?  What had he done?  He searched the faces and settled on Peggy's bright eyes and sharp red lips.  At least she didn't seem frightened and moved toward him.  
  
He took a step out of the pod and stumbled, unsteady with his new size and -  
  
"Let's get you sitting down and let the boys clear out some of your unnecessary audience," she said, keeping his attention and leading him to sit.  
  
"Jesus Christ, what did you put in that juice?" Howard blurted out, pivoting and facing down Dr. Erskine.  
  
"This is obviously because of your vita-rays, none of the other subjects had this reaction!" the doctor protested.  
  
"I think I need to see a mirror," Steve said under his breath so Peggy could hear him.  "How bad is it?"  His hands were - wow - he probably wouldn't be able to hold those colored pencils in his thick fingers.  
  
"It's not - it's - Steven, are you religious?"  
  
He didn't know why that mattered right now but something tickled his bare back and he turned and saw something - something - growing out of his back.  "Shit!"  He jerked and - fuck - wings - his wings - fluttered and spread in surprise, knocking expensive equipment to the floor as he tried to see.  
  
"Fuck Hydra, I'm not messing with that," a voice said and a man dropped a gun and stalked out of the room.  It took a moment too long for the soldiers to dart out after him.  
  
"Hey now, let's just relax, Rogers before you knock something over that we can't replace.  Can you control them?  Can I - " Howard reached out and touched the shimmering feathers without finishing his request for permission.  
  
"I think I need to call my priest," Steve said, but he could feel the feathers and they fluffed up in response to Howard's touch.  
  
"Hell, I think I need to **get** a priest," Howard said.  
  
Someone cleared their throats and Peggy gave him an apologetic look.  "I'll be back, don't worry."  
  
"Fuck," Steve whispered.  
  
"Such language from the guy with angel wings," Howard snickered.  
  
"Steven - I'm sorry, this wasn't even a variable, there's no DNA for the serum to enhance that includes wings, this is - a miracle," Dr. Erskine whispered.  
  
All Steve could think was how he was the personification of blasphemy.  He reached up and checked his head for horns.  "Do I have a demon tail?"  
  
"That ass is definitely sinful but it already was," Howard winked.  Dr. Erskine turned and narrowed a glare at the man.  He held up his hands and backed off.  "Sorry, sorry, but not really."  
  
Steve lowered his face in his giant hands and had no doubt his mom was disappointed in him.  
  
    ||*||  
  
"How do you feel about the RAF?" Peggy asked abruptly, finding him in his hastily arranged private quarters on base.  He couldn't stop staring at the wings emerging from his back.  He could extend them and touch both walls or he could tuck them in and look normal, if still giant, from the front.  
  
"I'm not sure I'm allowed.  My parents were Irish immigrants, so if they don't hate me on sight for being a Yank, they'll dislike me for that," Steve replied.  
  
She tore her eyes from his wings and met his eyes.  "You're working for the SSR, any contact you have with them will be tertiary."  
  
He sat down on the bed and she tsked at him.  "Even your wings look crestfallen."  
  
"They don't want me.  All this to enlist and serve my country and they don't even want me," Steve said.  
  
"The USA is not the only country that would value your service.  Dr. Erskine and Howard have both agreed to follow you and monitor your progress so we can fit you into the battle appropriately," she said.  She lowered her voice.  "They don't want you in a lab and the Army is going to lock you up and run tests on you indefinitely.  This is the best deal you're going to get."  
  
"Oh.  Sure.  The SSR is okay with it?"  
  
"The SSR fully supports your service to the Allies no matter what branch or country you're calling home.  Phillips can fuck himself," she added.  
  
He nodded.  "Okay, I'll need a crash course in the hierarchy of the RAF.  And well, everything.  Do I have to go through boot camp again?"  
  
She hesitated.  "We're hoping you can use your new body for something other than devastating the female populace of all the bases with your wings."  
  
"I can't even get a shirt over them," Steve replied, regretting it when it came out like a whine.  
  
"Howard's working on it.  How are you doing with it?  Do they hurt?" she asked, her professionalism slipping back into friendship.  
  
He fluttered them nervously when she dared run her fingers down the edge of the feathers.  "No.  They're…sensitive, but not in a bad way."  
  
She smoothed her fingers through the feathers with more confidence after that and his eyes almost closed, comforted by the kind touch after the disappointments of the day.  
  
"Don't make this a curse, Steve.  This is a gift, it's just up to you how you use it," Peggy said.  
  
"Any reason you're not swooning like the rest of the ladies?" he asked quietly.  
  
She leaned in and kissed his cheek.  "I don't swoon.  Plus, I'm your superior officer for the immediate future so it's not allowed."  
  
He smiled.  That was nice.  
  
"Besides, I threw my hat in the ring before you had muscles or wings so I hope I'm already a step ahead," she added with a final stroke of his feathers and disappeared before he could respond.  
  
    ||*||  
  
"Can you swim?" Howard yelled from the plane's cockpit.  
  
"Um.  Sure?" He'd never really tried but it couldn't be that hard to swing his arms and float.  
  
"If you can make those things on your back work, you won't have to!" Howard added.  He didn't know if it was another jab at the fact that he couldn't get himself off the ground by running or jumping but he was making fun of himself after so many failed tries.  
  
He'd spent the last few days in pilot's training, memorizing more of the aerodynamic details of how the planes flew than the details of the controls but they weren't going to give him a plane to crash when he had a body he could slam into things instead.  
  
He spread his wings in the cramped plane and checked to make sure he could get the angles he'd practiced before strapping the parachute across his chest instead of his back and moving to the hatch.  
  
"Glad I'm not afraid of heights," he muttered to himself.  Howard gave an eager hoot from the front and he pushed open the door and stepped out before he could doubt himself any further.  
  
Freefall was not all it was cracked up to be but his wings seemed to work without him needing to think, catching the air and surging him upward on the leftover airstream from the plane.  
  
**Much** better than freefall.  He twisted them, increasing his speed and altitude and managing to keep up with the plane for a short distance before letting himself circle lower and see how much control he could keep as he soared over the deserted lake.  
  
He spotted the landing strip but he waited for Howard to bring down his plane before slowly lowering himself to hover over the cluster of soldiers and lab techs filming from the edge.  
  
Peggy was visibly pleased and walked over to slap a British Flag on his chest.  "Welcome to the RAF, Agent Rogers."  
  
_Agent_.  He could get used to that.  Dr. Erskine rushed over to check his feathers and stick several electrodes to check his vitals.    
  
"If you really want to stick it to Phillips, I've got a lead on a test run," Howard announced, clapping Steve on the back between his wings.  "I'm designing the planes for Rogers' air support and I need to check them in a combat scenario."  
  
"Do you have orders?" Peggy asked, frowning.  
  
Howard shrugged and turned to Steve.  "What do you say?  Think you can jump out of a plane and not get shot if I drop you across enemy lines?"  
  
"Depends on what you're dropping me into," Steve replied.  He guessed he wasn't going to have the same kind of command structure he'd expected with the Army.  
  
"HYDRA base, we think.  We don't have much intel and we can't get a good view of the area with scouts, but I figure if we spray you down with camouflage and send you out for recon, we can see if that's where they're keeping the POWs we can't track down," Howard said.  "Got a couple of buddies with the 107th that owe me a drink," he added.  
  
"The 107th?" Steve asked immediately.  
  
"Stark," Peggy warned.  
  
But Steve met the crazy scientist's gaze and knew that he'd be buying the man a drink for the rest of that story.  
  
"It's too soon to even consider putting him into a combat situation," Dr. Erskine protested.  "We need more tests."  
  
Steve could fly.  He'd take as many tests as they wanted if he'd be allowed to do it again.  And if Howard's absent mention of the 107th and POW's in the same sentence had been more than a coincidence - he'd be flying regardless of it being 'allowed'.  
  
    ||*||  
  
"You're walking pretty stiff for someone that's supposed to be the peak of human perfection," Howard said, raising his glass of dark alcohol in greeting.  
  
"It's not comfortable at all, I think I liked those stretchy belt things better than this harness," Steve muttered.  He had to keep the wings hidden but nothing was comfortable.  
  
"Where are you headed tonight?  I've got a few ladies coming by, you're welcome to take your pick.  Harder to find a cheap date in the middle of a warfield," Howard said.  
  
He checked himself in the mirror again but he knew Howard would point out if his wings were noticeable.  "I'm going to put flowers on my Ma's grave, make confession and make sure Bucky's family's taken care of.  Then I'm coming back to sleep in your guest room, alone, and pretend like I don't know what you're doing with all those ladies."  
  
Howard smirked at him but there was a softness behind his mischief and his face sobered.  "You're a good man, Steve Rogers."  
  
"You're a good man, too, Howard.  That means a lot coming from you," Steve said.  
  
Howard scoffed.  "I'm a drunken playboy that likes to blow stuff up on the government's dime."  
  
"You're helping people the best way you can.  You're a millionaire - you don't have to help with the war effort - but you are because it's the right thing to do," Steve said.  "I can hear better now, you know, and I heard you defending me to those SSR scientists," he added.  "They'd have me pinned open like a butterfly under glass but you've never treated me differently.  I consider you a friend, Howard, I don't know where I'd be if you weren't backing me up."  
  
"You don't know me well enough yet, obviously," Howard replied after a beat.  
  
"We've both known each other the same length of time, so if you get to believe that I'm a good man, then you can't stop me from thinking the same about you.  You're just maudlin because you started drinking before dinner.  You should eat something else and have a smoke and by then your girls will be here to cheer you up."  
  
"Go earn your wings, Rogers, I'll be here earning my horns," Howard winked, but he squeezed his arm fondly when he went in search of a fresh drink.  
  
    ||*||  
  
Bucky's family had always been kind to him, mostly, but things had shifted after his mother's death when Bucky moved out and in with Steve.  He didn't know if it was because they missed having him contribute to the household or because they thought Steve was a deviant out to seduce their precious only son; but it didn't change the fact that Bucky was Steve's only family and they were Bucky's family.  
  
He didn't have to send money home to tend to his mother, or pay rent on the apartment that no one would be living in.  Steve had wings and he wasn't dumb enough to think he' ever be able to live in public again.  Maybe he could get on with a freak show but he figured he'd sold his soul to the SSR and would be working with them indefinitely.  
  
But he had been given an advance to 'make his arrangements' and had the cashier's check in hand when he knocked on the door.  Hell, they might not even recognize him like this - taller in new (expensive!) clothes but hopefully they wouldn't call the cops on him before they heard him out.  
  
The door opened finally and Mrs. Barnes blinked up at him.  Her eyes widened.  "Steve?"  
  
"Hi, Mrs. Barnes."  
  
"Stop it, I've been Winifred to you for years, boy, and get in here.  I thought you enlisted - you disappeared without a goodbye and let me tell you, Bucky's never let us hear the end of it - what - what happened to you?" She hugged him tightly and he hoped she wouldn't feel the wings tucked under his clothes.  
  
"It's complicated and, well, classified.  I'm heading out tomorrow and - well, you wouldn't believe it if I told you but - "  
  
"You've grown three feet and gained muscles that boys your age shouldn't even know about - I think I'd believe it.  Steve - are - is it safe?"  
  
He shifted.  He wasn't expecting this much kindness.  "Not really, that's why I'm here.  I wondered if you had a few moments to go over some things with me?"  
  
"Of course, come in, if you can fit, that is.  I can't believe how tall you've gotten, what are they doing to you boys in the Army?" Winifred asked.  
  
"A lot of exercise and yelling, I'm not looking forward to what comes next," he admitted, following her into the familiar apartment.  He didn't take the rickety chair he usually sat in, it would probably break under his new weight.  
  
She moved toward the stove but he waved off her offer of tea or coffee.  "I'm not going to stay too long."  
  
"But the girls will want to see you, they'll never believe me.  Have you heard..." she bit off the rest of her question.  
  
"I haven't gotten mail in weeks, but I don't know where they're forwarding my mail," he answered.  She didn't need to know that the 107th was assumed to be captured and probably KIA.  He was going to find out the truth and bring her son home either way.  
  
"Last letter we got was a few weeks ago," she admitted.  "Over a month.  I know that he's doing his duty but...I wish he was here."  
  
He nodded.  If Bucky was here, Steve wouldn't have had to come and give the woman more baggage to deal with.  He wouldn't be terrified of diving into enemy territory only to find his best friend's body.  He wouldn't be a monster with wings and a life signed away to science.  
  
"Sorry, Steve, I know you miss him, too.  How are you?  How can I help?" Winifred asked, visibly steadying herself.  "Are you sure you can't stay to see the girls?"  
  
"I'm shipping out early tomorrow."  He pulled out the folded envelope he'd had Howard sign witness for earlier in the week.  "I've been putting Bucky down as my next of kin since Mom passed.  He's not here to sign anything and since you're his next of kin, it seems right to put you down on my paperwork since you're here and safe."  He pointed at the first set of numbers.  "This is my bank account, it'll pay for things if I don't get back and the rest goes to Bucky.  Since he's not here, you're the second name I put on the account."  
  
"Oh, Steve, no," she said.  
  
"I know I have no right to ask, but - your family has always been there for me and I'll never be able to repay your kindness the way you deserve," he said honestly.  "Bucky's like a brother to me - this is the fair thing to do.  I have a separate account with...my new job - "  
  
"I thought you enlisted," she stopped him.  
  
"I did, but it's not with the Army so much anymore.  I can't talk about it, but this account is the one where I'll have money sent to provide for my family while I'm overseas.  This money is for you and the girls now, and Bucky when he gets back - you're the closest thing to family I have right now.  I'm - things are going to be okay for me," he said steadily.  "I have enough, more than enough, to get by while I'm away and as long as you don't mind Bucky bringing me over for holidays, then you'll earn every cent until I get back or Bucky gets claim over it."  
  
He'd never be able to live in Brooklyn again with wings.  He'd never be able to come with Bucky to holiday dinners.  He'd never see Winifred again.  The next time he'd be in Brooklyn would be in a pine box.  More likely on a scientist's dissection table but the end was the same.  
  
"Honey, you can't do this, you're going to come home and you'll need this," she said with damp eyes.  
  
"I have enough without it.  You've been providing for the girls on your own since Mr. Barnes passed and with Bucky overseas and the girls too young to get good jobs - I want to help.  I want Becca to get her education before she has to marry someone just to pay bills, I want Kimberly to be able to have a new dress for every season that she sings in the choir so she won't feel left out by the other girls.  I want you to be able to go to the clinic when your knees act up and not worry about how to pay for it.  It's what Bucky will use the money for when he gets home so until he does, you're in charge.  Please.  I'm shipping out in the morning and I don't want to worry about this kind of stuff when I'm gone."  He paused.  "I'm really worried about Bucky and I'd never forgive myself if I didn't at least take care of you and the girls.  He's going to kick my ass for all this," he motioned to himself, "So I want to have something good to tell him."  
  
She finally nodded and folded the papers in front of her.  "I haven't been entirely fair to you, Steve."  
  
He didn't want to get any more emotional and hoped he could dodge this conversation.  "Not true, you've always been good to me.  You fed me, gave me clothes and helped me mend my own.  I wouldn't have survived without your family."  
  
"You and Bucky," she started, without finishing.  She was waiting for his confession.  
  
He sighed.  "I'm nineteen years old and an adult and we are having this conversation," he said halfway to himself.  "I am not in a deviant relationship with your son.  He's my best friend and I love him but it's always been platonic.  Bucky likes women and he's going to make some lady a very happy and frustrated wife someday.  I assume you're talking about Ralphie."  
  
She went pale but didn't deny it.  
  
He took another deep breath.  He couldn't believe he was talking to his best friend's mother about intimate details.  "Bucky took out a girl, Sallie, a few times and he kept hassling her about bringing a friend for me.  So she finally did, a cute girl my own size named Rachel.  I didn't know Rachel was really Ralphie.  I've never been good with women - Rachel was my first kiss, how was I supposed to know she was a boy?"  Winifred raised her eyebrow and Steve flushed.  "I haven't - I don't - I didn't know until Ralphie told me himself.  He felt bad about lying to me.  Nobody else told me, not even Bucky.  He's the only one I confronted about it and he - he said I'd still be his brother no matter who I wanted to kiss and we never talked about it again.  He never treated me differently and he never let anyone else."  
  
"Oh..."  
  
"Ralphie, or Rachel as she likes to be called, is a great girl.  If I'd known the truth up front, I might have still gone out with her, but I would have done it differently, privately.  It wouldn't have been the neighborhood joke.  The point is - you never treated me differently, not really.  The whole thing just confirmed what everyone was thinking."  He thought of Peggy and huffed out a laugh.  "The first time I meet a dame I might actually have a chance with and Bucky's not even here to tell me what to do about it."  
  
His fancy Stark watch beeped and he knew his time was up.  
  
"Steve.  I'm sorry," she said.  
  
"There's nothing to apologize for.  But if you'd like to do something for me...I'd like someone to put flowers at Ma's grave every once and a while.  Maybe..."  
  
"I'll make sure, once a week," she promised, clasping his hand.  
  
    ||*||  
  
He came up with the plan with Howard's maps and snitched reports describing previous encounters with HYDRA.  There were even a couple of checklists in Dr. Erskine's handwriting so he filed all of it away and mapped out their unauthorized mission to the secret base.  
  
He didn't like keeping it a secret from Peggy but they would need plausible deniability.  Howard had enough of an 'impulsive' reputation that he was willing to take the fall if, no, *when* it worked out.  
  
It was Steve's first real attempt at making a mission plan so of course it didn't run smooth.  He jumped out two miles early and left his long jacket to cover his wings on the plane but he couldn't turn back.  It gave Howard extra time to land his shielded plane and wait for Steve's signal.  
  
He took a few wide circles to memorize the roads and trails leading up to the compound.  He wasn't the best shot but Howard's weapons didn't need accuracy.  He looped and squeezed the trigger, the soundless burst of energy taking out guards silently and giving him a head start on the alarms.  He needed to wait until the last possible moment to land since he wouldn't be able to go airborne again on his own.  
  
He'd taken out as many as he could avoiding the roaming spotlights and trying to map out the base.  There was only one chance to get in and he needed to pick his entry point.  
  
Only one building had armed guards at every exit and he made the sign of the cross when he saw the open skylight at the side.  He circled and held his breath before flattening his wings and starting a dive toward the window.  
  
He watched as it came closer and spotted a guard walking through the opening and angled his arms so when he burst through the narrow entry in the skylight he hit the man with double fists, slamming and skidding them both across the floor into the wall.  
  
There were voices but no alarms and he turned away from the guard's crushed skull and his bloody hands to keep his focus.  He'd just silently blasted twenty men to death outside, he couldn't let this dead body break his plan.  
  
**Focus**.  Yes.  Keys and then find the cells, all the guards had keys.  
  
_"I told you, the bloke's got wings!"_ a voice said from below him.  Convenient to have grates over the cells so they could see in from above.  
  
"Hang on, I'm coming to get you," he said, pushing himself to his feet and taking the downed guard's gun with his keys and heading to the stairs.  Back on plan.  
  
It was only when he opened the door to the holding cells and counted the heads that grossly outnumbered the count in the plan that he had a smidge of worry that things were going to get worse.  
  
    ||*||

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (I have (real) Thursday and Friday off so today is my Thursday. Plus, I have another story I'm finishing for next Thursday. Yay lists!)
> 
> I am checking ALL the boxes on my UnFuck My Life list. Workouts, check, 40 oz of water (and freedom!), check, filing taxes and being a grown-ass-woman, check.


	2. Chapter 2

  
"What do you think they'll do to me when we get back?" Steve asked, slumping into the remarkably comfortable seat in Howard's tent.  
  
Howard glanced at him curiously.  "Nothing.  You're here because I dragged you along.  They can't touch me and I won't let them punish you when we actually did a good thing.  You saved a shit-ton of people."  
  
"You're the only reason it was possible but…I think General Phillips would lock me up if it was up to him," Steve admitted.  He didn't want to talk about Bucky refusing to see him and declaring him an abomination just like the red-skinned guy that had blown up the base around them.  
  
Howard gave him another look.  "Phillips is blowing his top because he wants you on his team.  Too bad you're a pilot now, not infantry."  
  
"He made it pretty clear back in New York that he didn't want me anywhere near his men and Peggy risked a lot getting me involved over here at all.  She's going to kill me," Steve said.  
  
"You're not worried about any of that, you're worried about that jerk that won't talk to you," Howard pointed out.  
  
Steve wanted to disappear.  "Yeah.  But at least he's alive and he'll get home safe back to his family and that's all that matters."  
  
Howard reached down and grabbed a mostly full bottle of dark liquor from his pack.  "As a man with no family worth remembering and no friends that stay more than a night or two before getting fed up, I can't imagine."  He filled two tin mugs and held out one for Steve.  
  
"Metabolism makes it a waste," Steve said, but took it anyway.  
  
"Considering how important Barnes is to you, I figure he'll forgive you when he's a little steadier.  You volunteered for our experiment and he didn't have the same choice.  He'll get over it," Howard said.  
  
"How do you know?" Steve asked quietly.  
  
"Because it's you and you're pretty hard to stay mad at," Howard shrugged.  
  
Steve raised his cup and clinked it against Howard's.  "Thanks.  At least you're still my friend."  
  
"Yeah, you're stuck with me until I steal your girlfriend or seduce you," Howard winked.  
  
"Try not to do that until we're out of this war," Steve replied.  
  
Howard waved him off but his face softened.  "What are you going to do after the war?"  
  
Steve shook his head.  "No idea.  I mean, I've got wings so I'm pretty bound for labrat status, right?"  
  
"You'll work for me, testing things, something.  I won't let them lock you away.  When I agreed to help with Rebirth, I didn't expect to ruin lives and your life, buddy, is kind of ruined right now."  
  
"I can only focus on one thing at a time.  I want to help win this war, I want to put these Nazis back in the hole they crawled out of.  After that's done, we'll see where I'm going to land.  Granted, circling around while you blow up stuff sounds kind of fun," Steve added.  
  
Someone cleared their throat outside of the tent before the flap flipped up slightly to reveal one of the men from the camp.  He was clean with clear eyes, a definite improvement.  "Ah, Agent Rogers, I was hoping you'd be here.  If you have a moment, I would like to speak with you."  The British one.  Okay.  
  
Steve glanced at Howard who only curled his arm around the liquor protectively.  "Uh, sure?"  
  
"My name is James Falsworth, from - "  
  
"The British Army, I remember.  I, sort of, crashed into his group's holding cell," Steve explained to Howard.  
  
The man smiled.  "It was definitely a rescue none of us expected.  And apparently one that we're not supposed to talk about in public or private."  
  
Steve shifted uncomfortably, his wings fluttering inside their harness.  
  
"I've learned that you're currently working with the RAF branch of the SSR.  As a member of the 3rd Independent Parachute Brigade, I'd like to find out what would be necessary to join your team.  You do have a team, don't you?" Falsworth asked.  
  
Howard snorted out a laugh.  "Bastard's in here thinking they're going to lock him in the Tower of London for desertion."  
  
Steve thumped him and Howard winced, rubbing at the spot dramatically.  
  
"Surely not…or…oh.  This wasn't an official mission?"  
  
Steve shook his head.  "We haven't exactly checked in at home base yet."  
  
Howard widened his eyes innocently.  "I haven't flown in European airspace in ages, I can't believe we got this lost."  
  
Falsworth bit back a laugh.  "Quite.  Well, the request stands.  You'll need men you can trust not to talk about those…experimental parachutes we saw strapped to your back."  
  
Howard and Steve shared another glance but Howard finally took Steve's cup from him and passed it to Falsworth.  
  
"Cheers," Falsworth grinned, raising the cup.  "If we're speaking freely, I should tell you that you have no reason to fear being arrested, or even reprimanded from what I've heard.  Phillips is raging mad that the SSR won't reassign you here and the RAF bloke keeps judging him politely as per British policy.  I don't really care who you work for, or where you came from, I'd just like to be on a team that can do some damage to those HYDRA bastards."  
  
"I haven't even met any of the British soldiers I'll be working with.  My first time in the field was the first day we met," Steve admitted.  Falsworth was visibly surprised.  
  
"I wish I'd been able to see it from the cockpit, you should have seen the guy pick up flying, took one time jumping out of a plane and he was doing loop-de-loops," Howard said.  
  
"I didn't see him fly, only crash land but his wings didn't get us out of that hell.  You and the kid got us out, our own countries would have let us rot," Falsworth said.  "You're scrappy enough but if you try any flying shit in a war zone, you won't last ten minutes.  You can do so much more," he added seriously to Steve.  
  
"I don't really have any say in the matter.  I signed a shit-ton of papers and the Army still sold me to the SSR," Steve admitted.  
  
"It doesn't work that way and you know it," Howard snorted.  "You're an agent of the SSR and they have their hands in countries I haven't even heard of but they're not a publicly known operation.  They run on secrets so they have to stay secret, but you - "  
  
"We - " Steve corrected.  
  
"Not me, it's well-known I'm part of the Allied effort - but **you** saved a few hundred POWs in plain view so they need you under somebody's umbrella before the story spreads too far.  They got calls from the Vatican when one of the techs blabbed about you to his priest," Howard replied.  "Peggy's going to kiss you or kill you for this stunt."  
  
As much as he wanted a kiss from Peggy, a merciful death was sounding better the more he thought about the next step.  But he had a lot to do first - he had to find Schmidt.  
  
"I'd be honored to have you on my team, if I get a choice," Steve said.  
  
Falsworth raised his cup and finished it off.  "They've already given us confidentiality papers and there are quite a few others that would jump at an offer from you."  
  
He considered it.  "That French guy, he's pretty savvy with a bomb and the man from Fresno was the only one that could make heads or tails of the radio on that HYDRA tank."  
  
"Make a list and we'll send Peggy a telegram," Howard said, glancing at his cup and then the bottle.  
  
Steve smiled at him, fond.  "Drink, you don't have a lab here and you'll get in trouble if you hit on any dames on base.  You'll need your head back in the game when we get to London."  
  
Howard nodded and reopened the bottle.  "Then let's be sure we get a good night's sleep tonight."  
  
    ||*||  
  
Steve watched another convoy of rescued soldiers disappear down the muddy trail and checked his watch.  The injured were all on the road and Howard and Phillips should be coming to collect him soon.  
  
He hadn't seen Bucky on any of the trucks.  A lot of the men had come by to thank him or say goodbye at least, but not Bucky.  He'd been released from medical but had refused all of Steve's requests to see him before and avoided him after.  
  
He was hollow.  It was wrong.  Bucky was safe and alive and hopefully on the fast track back to Brooklyn - Steve should be satisfied, hell, over the moon about it.  He'd helped people, he'd helped Bucky.  
  
But he lost him anyway.  Bucky had always been his constant.  Now Steve had to do it on his own, completely and utterly on his own.  With wings.  
  
He glanced at his watch again.  He was going to be fine.  He was an SSR Agent with a freshly approved team of his own under Peggy and Phillips' supervision.  Steve didn't have a real problem with the General but he'd never met the man's expectations and he would doubt himself at every interaction because of it.  
  
Bucky wasn't on his team.  If Bucky didn't go back to Brooklyn to be with his family then Steve would want him by his side but he -   
  
Steve had too many other things to think about right now to think about Bucky.  
  
 _"You're grinding your jaw, punk."_  
  
He hoped he didn't flinch.  
  
"Glad some of the crowd's gone.  I wanted...we should talk," Bucky said, slouching down to sit at Steve's side.  He scanned Steve from top to bottom.  "It's...I can't get used to it."  His eyes trailed to Steve's back, searching for the wings tucked away under the special jacket.  
  
"It's definitely new," Steve replied.  "Are you...how are you feeling?"  
  
Bucky shrugged.  God, they'd never had trouble making conversation.  He felt sick.  "I've gotta see this doctor in England, Erskine?  They...they did something to me, Steve," he whispered.  
  
"What?" He turned to him sharply.  
  
"They - I don't know, I don't remember shit, just, flashes," Bucky mumbled, not meeting his eyes.  "I know it hurt and I know that I'm different now.  You have wings, Steve, and Schmidt has red devil skin - what - what does that make me?  I don't know what's real and the docs just say its shell shock, but I know it's more.  You're not supposed to be here, Steve.  You were never supposed to be *here*, you're supposed to be home safe, never *here*."  
  
"Bucky," Steve said, catching his attention.  "I never gave up on enlisting and whatever those bastards did to you - Erskine will figure it out, he'll - "  
  
"Fix it?  Can he fix you?" Bucky asked immediately.  
  
"I - " _Shit_.  "Until a few days ago, I was considered another failed experiment.  Like you said, red skin or wings, neither one are normal."  
  
Bucky snorted.  "So I'm just another dead lab rat."  
  
"Hell, if you turn out to be super-powered, you'll be the first success of the serum," Steve said.  "You'll be the soldier they wanted me to be, not a freak.  You can trust Erskine, I trust him, he'll do right by you, no matter what."  
  
Bucky leaned back and glanced down at Steve's bag again.  "Where are you headed?"  
  
"England with the rest of you.  I have to meet up with Dr. Erskine myself, so I'll probably see you around until they assign me something else to do.  I mean, if you want to see me around, they can schedule it..." Steve backtracked.  
  
Bucky stared at him.  "Fuck you.  Stevie, if you're here, I'm damned well going to stick with you.  You're my best friend and out of all the bullshit I've yanked you out of over the years, do you really think I'd leave you in this mess by yourself?"  
  
"But...you didn't want to see me," Steve replied, hating the crack in his voice.  
  
"Don't hold that against me," Bucky said quietly.  "I...I'm fucked up.  I'd started to believe that the rescue wasn't a hallucination by the time we got here, but as soon as they laid me out in medical, I thought I was back in that place.  And you - you aren't the same as I remember so _hallucination_ seemed the safest solution at the time.  But I didn't throw up at all yesterday so I'm on solid food and have a clean bill of physical health now.  I've also heard from enough people about how stupid you are to know that you're real.  Only you would sign up for an experiment to get a ride into this hell."  
  
"Rogers!  Carter got us permission to take the plane, get your shit!" Howard called from a nearby tent.  
  
"You and Stark seem close," Bucky said.  Steve recognized that grumble.  
  
Steve bumped shoulders with him.  "My best friends have always been jerks.  I missed you.  Since you believe that I'm real now, will you let me fucking help you?"  
  
"Guess that depends on whether I'm riding in a bumpy, smelly convoy or getting a seat on your plane," Bucky said.  
  
Steve met his gaze.  "You could go home, all of you guys are getting a chance to - "  
  
"Not without you.  Didn't we go through this already?" Bucky said.  "They won't let me sign up for your team until the fancy doc clears me.  Good thing I've got a friend who can put in a word.  Right?"  
  
Steve smiled and threw an arm around him.  "I'll see what I can do."  
  
Howard stepped fully out of the tent with a bulging suitcase.  "Give me a hand, will you?"  
  
"Hey, you think Bucky can ride with us?" Steve asked, picking up the suitcase easily along with his own duffle.  
  
Howard evaluated him.  "He'll have to ride up front.  You know how to fly a plane?"  
  
"No," Bucky replied after short glance to Steve.  
  
"Good, I won't have to worry about you touching things," Howard shrugged, turning back to Steve.  "They want you to take a test flight, you think you can jump out, wave for the stuffy guys and then get back on?"  
  
He'd never tried getting back on the plane in midair but they'd discussed it.  "I don't know if I have the speed for that, but if I catch the right kind of tailwind..."  
  
"You're not going to able to just wait for the 'right tailwind' when other planes are shooting at you," Bucky said.  
  
"We'll figure it out, you got stuff, Barnes?" Howard asked.  
  
"I think they already mailed it home," Bucky admitted.  
  
Howard nodded.  "Come on, then.  We'll get you kitted out back on Allied ground."  
  
"I saw your mom before I left New York," Steve said as they followed Howard toward the airstrip.  "She seems good."  
  
"She let you walk out of there without wringing your neck at this stunt?" Bucky asked.  
  
"He skipped a fantastic party to go see her, you should lecture him for that, too," Howard grinned.  
  
    ||*||  
  
"I'm not really good with docs lately," Bucky admitted outside of Erskine's lab.  Steve had noticed his friend's trembling but hadn't asked.  Bucky didn't like if you asked if he was okay, so Steve had used the proven technique of giving him sad, worried looks until he admitted whatever was wrong.  
  
Steve nodded.  "I figured that out when you decided to start talking to me again.  I'm going to be getting my checkup, too so we'll be in the same room and they aren't going to do anything to you without permission." He hesitated.  "Erskine understands more about how HYDRA treats their test subjects than I do."  
  
"And you trust him?" Bucky asked.  
  
Steve nodded.  "Yeah.  You'll have to make up your own mind, but I trust him with the science part."  
  
The door opened and Peggy - wow, she looked amazing - raised an eyebrow at them.  "Gentlemen, are you going to loiter outside of the room all morning or can we get some work done?"  
  
Steve felt his cheeks burn when she focused on him.  "Agent Carter, of course, uh, this is Sergeant Barnes..."  
  
"It's nice to meet you, Sergeant.  I hope you'll be able to assist in keeping Agent Rogers from making stupid decisions that jeopardize his life," Peggy said.  
  
"Haven't been much help this far, ma'am, but I'm happy to try," Bucky said with a smirk.  
  
"Howard said you weren't mad," Steve said before Bucky started to flirt.  
  
"Howard Stark is an idiot, and so are you if you believe anything he says," she replied, steering him into the room by his elbow.  
  
"Hey now!" Howard objected from inside the lab.  Steve didn't think he was going to be here for the medical parts but Bucky visibly relaxed.  The two had bonded in the cockpit of the plane while Steve was showing off and genuinely struggling to keep up speed across the English Channel.  
  
"Steven, Mr. Barnes, are you both well?" Dr. Erskine greeted them.  
  
"I'm good, Doctor," Steve said.  Bucky gave him a warning look.  "Bucky has a headache and he's favoring his left arm."  
  
"Steve's been rubbing his eyes since the plane landed," Bucky replied, frowning.  
  
"Bucky won't eat anything but bread."  
  
"Steve has a huge stick up his - " Bucky started but Peggy cleared her throat.  Howard chuckled openly across the room.  
  
"Boys.  You are both grown men that can answer for yourselves," Peggy said.  
  
Dr. Erskine smiled fondly and patted Steve's arm.  "I'll start your friend's exam while Agent Carter starts her lecture, it should be entertaining enough to distract Mr. Barnes."


	3. Chapter 3

"They want me back for some more tests," Bucky admitted the next morning.  
  
Steve paused in fitting his wing harness.  "Why?"  
  
Bucky avoided his gaze.  "Told you they did stuff to me.  My arm…it's different."  
  
"Bucky - "  
  
"They don't know anything yet, Howard's supposed to have some results to go over," Bucky interrupted.  "I don't want to talk about it yet."  
  
Steve steadied himself the best he could.  Why would Howard be giving him results?  "You got mad at me for not telling you about the serum, but you don't want me to ask you."  
  
Bucky sighed.  "They always used my left arm to give me shots.  I thought it hurt because of that, but…it's not that."  He held out his hand and Steve took it, confused.  
  
His hand was cold.  Freezing.  And hard.  He finally looked closely at the fingers and saw a shimmer from the dim lights.  "Metal."  
  
"Yeah.  My arm, it's - it's turning into metal.  Erskine says - he says a lot, but…I'm going to have a metal arm," Bucky said.  
  
Steve let out a breath.  "Shit.  Does it hurt?"  
  
"Fuck yes," Bucky whispered.  "But Erskine says it'll get better as it settles.  Its - fuck, Steve, what's happening to us?  I mean, sure, it's weird you can fly but this, what am I supposed to do?"  
  
"We work with what we have.  It's how we've always gotten by, Buck, we'll make it work," Steve said.  "You'll probably have an atomic punch or something great," he added.  
  
Bucky snorted.  "I am stronger, but I doubt I'm going to get hired for hammering nails with my fist."  
  
"How's your aim?" Steve asked.  He'd heard the stories by now of Bucky's impeccable sniping.    
  
Bucky flipped him off with a shiny finger.  "Are you meeting with your keepers today?"  
  
"Ten minutes," Steve replied.  "I didn't think I got that much from Schmidt's lab but they want me to walk them through the map again, help come up with a plan.  I'm still not sure who I'm supposed to answer to.  I don't even have a rank with the Army and I still haven't met any of the RAF guys."  
  
"You're stupid," Bucky muttered.  "If you want a rank, they'll give you a rank - if you want a plane, they'll buy you one - you're holding all the cards, Steve.  * **I** * know you don't bluff but those assholes don't, they think you're biding your time."  
  
He met Bucky's eyes.  "What are we going to do?"  
  
"We?  This is all you, buddy," Bucky countered.  
  
"Nah, because you're just as much of a super-soldier as I am now, and you're presentable.  The Pope's not going to excommunicate you if they put you on posters," Steve said.  
  
"I'm not Catholic so I wouldn't care anyway," Bucky blinked.  
  
"You're going to be their Captain America," Steve said.  "The Senator and Phillips, they want a posterboy, a figurehead for morale."  
  
Bucky blinked at him again.  "No."  
  
"What?  Why not?  You're perfect for it - "  
  
Bucky shook his head.  "No.  You signed up for that but not me.  It's not my fault they let the Brits have you.  But I'd follow that Carter dame anywhere she wanted to take me," he added.  
  
" _Bucky_."  
  
He laughed, pointing at Steve.  "Knew that would rile you."  
  
Steve flipped him off and sat down on the bed.  This was a nicer bed than any of the troops were sleeping on.  "They gave me a team.  They want me to plot out HYDRA bases on a map.  I'm getting paid by the SSR and have Howard Stark building me whatever toys I want."  
  
"Now you're getting it," Bucky said.  
  
"I think I have a plan, Buck," Steve realized.  
  
"I sure hope so.  I don't trust anyone else to polish my armor if I turn into a robot," Bucky snorted.  
  
"I'm not polishing anything of yours, God, you make everything about sex, ugh."  He scowled at Bucky who smirked at him.  "Go see Dr. Erskine and then round up the rest of the team.  Find me at headquarters, I'm going to try something."  
  
    ||*||  
  
He's pleased with his plan and Peggy only had to nudge his shoe for reassurance a couple of times before the meeting swung his way.  
  
"Don't fuck this up, Captain," Phillips growled at him when the conference room emptied out for the arrival of Bucky and his team.  
  
"Way to clear a room, guys," Steve grinned, motioning for them to fill in the vacated seats.  Peggy didn't move from his side and Bucky winked at her as he took his place at Steve's left.  
  
"How'd it go?" Bucky asked, sobering when he met Steve's gaze.  
  
"I don't think I have a career in politics, but agreements were made," Steve replied.  "You?"  
  
Bucky glanced at Peggy and took a deep breath.  He carefully pulled off his jacket.  He was wearing short sleeves and his arm was fully silver and gleaming from his fingertips to his shoulder.  Steve didn't think and immediately reached out to check the 'seam' where the metal ended and the skin started.  
  
"That's as far as it goes, that it'll ever go.  Erskine gave me something to finish the transition.  Feels different, but doesn't hurt," Bucky said, curling his hand into a fist and then splaying his fingers.  Metal plates, almost like scales, rippled with his motions.  
  
Dernier and Jones openly stared but Falsworth seemed more thoughtful than surprised.  
  
"That's remarkable," Peggy murmured, tapping his wrist with one of her rings.  
  
"Shiny, too.  I let Howard polish it up for me," Bucky smirked at Steve.  He rolled his eyes.  
  
"What's with the suits, Boss?" Morita asked from the far end of the table.  "We got a mission?"  
  
"Yeah, we do," Steve said.  "We're going to have a lot of missions if we pull the first one off."  
  
"And you will, Captain, considering how many hands you shook today," Peggy said.  
  
"* _Captain_ *?  Really?" Bucky huffed.  
  
"Not really," Steve replied.  "They want a superhero, so they're going to have one - Captain America."  He held up a sketch he'd done while one of the suits had babbled about propaganda.  "HYDRA knows I'm American and I don't have any living family to risk if they drop my name.  I'm the public face of Captain America - they won't show my wings," he added for Bucky's benefit.  
  
Falsworth looked less thoughtful and definitely surprised but Dernier and Jones were still staring at Bucky's hand.  
  
"You guys are the Howling Commandos," Steve said, nodding to Falsworth and Dugan for dropping the name at the bar earlier in the week.  "The Captain will be on posters and sell war bonds and whatever else they need in my down time."  He looked at each of them meaningfully.  "That's the reason she calls me Captain.  In the field, none of that means anything."  
  
"I don't get it," Jones said after a beat.  
  
Steve took a breath to steady himself.  "We're a team.  Each of you have special skill sets and perspectives and we're all risking our lives out there.  Sure, I have wings and muscles, but that doesn't automatically make me a leader.  I'm going to run point most of the time because I'm flashy.  The Army wants me to be seen, and I'll draw HYDRA's focus.  Morita, Jones and Dernier, I want you to spend some time with Howard, learn everything you can about the HYDRA tech we found and the bombs, their communicators - everything you can.  Falsworth, Barnes and Dugan - we're going to study the maps and whatever schematics we can find on the HYDRA bases before we go in."  
  
"Agent Rogers has managed to gain autonomy from the RAF and the US Army.  Your team is solely bound to the SSR and will operate under his, and Sergeant Barnes', direction.  With guidance from myself and General Phillips, of course," Peggy said.  "HYDRA's your top priority at the moment."  
  
"How'd my name get in that hat?" Barnes asked.  
  
"I wanted Monty's name on it, too.  But there's Erskine and the serum and a lot of little things tying us to the SSR and - " he hesitated, glancing at Peggy and then back to Bucky.  "And I had to make some concessions.  You'll be wearing the Captain America suit as much as I will.  Sometimes I'll be - "  
  
"Rarely," Peggy interjects.  
  
He rolled his eyes.  "Sometimes I'll be running recon from above but Erskine doesn't want me flying more than I have to.  Whoever's wearing the suit on a mission answers to Captain."  
  
"I think you're our Captain with or without the suit.  Your plan got us out of a HYDRA base that wasn't on any maps or radio channels," Morita said.  
  
"You managed to keep all the men that escaped alive until we hiked to base - you're the lead, Rogers," Dugan added.  
  
"I have a lot to learn," Steve said.  "The raid on the base was my first and only combat experience.  The first few missions are my trial by fire, and I need men that are willing to speak up when something on the plan doesn't look right.  We're going to set up camp in Belfast - "  
  
"Ireland," Monty said, confused.  
  
"There's little to no HYDRA activity there, even before the blitzes," Steve said.  "The SSR doesn't have a base there.  We'll take two weeks to train and get a plan together and I'll shop it to the suits when I'm due back in London for press.  Howard's already shipping parts down so we'll be armed and have quick transport for our first op."  
  
"You don't want the SSR to know what we're doing," Bucky said.  
  
Peggy cleared her throat.  "We'll receive regular reports that I'm _sure_ will include all the details in full."  
  
"That's the deal," Steve said, recapturing their attention.  "We can't take down the Third Reich on our own but if we put our heads together and work smart - I know we can take down HYDRA without risking the lives of soldiers that don't know what they're up against."  
  
"You think we'll be ready in two weeks?" Falsworth asked.  
  
"You're going to teach me how to fight, Gabe's going to teach us enough German and French to get by, Dernier's going to show me how not to blow up everything and Dugan's going to teach me how to drive tanks.  So no, we won't be ready, but we'll be prepared," Steve said.  
  
"We're going to talk more about this, at length, later," Bucky said under his breath.  
  
Steve smiled, exhaling.  He knew that spark in Bucky's eye - he was in.  
  
"Well, I'm all for making shit up as we go, I vote we go out for a drink on our new Captain's tab," Dugan announced.  
  
    ||*||  
  
"Stop staring, keep shooting," Steve said, hoping he didn't sound as out of breath as he felt.  
  
They'd infiltrated the perimeter in pitch darkness and taken down the first line of HYDRA's defenses without setting off a single alarm.  
  
It didn't last and now they were neck-deep in gunfire and flash-bombs.  Oh, and mutated corpses, there was that, too.  
  
"What the hell - "  
  
He flung his shield and took out three incoming HYDRA soldiers before Dernier's hoot and follow-up explosion signaled the next phase.  He yanked Dugan by the collar and caught the shield and managed to block the stray sniper bullets before they both went down.  
  
"Thanks, Cap.  After you," Dugan panted, snapping out of his daze from the corpses and shooting the doorknob off the office door.  
  
"Get everything you can, we need to be out in five.  I'll set the charges," Steve said.  
  
"That's not part of the plan," Dugan said.  "But thanks," he added, going to work raking papers and maps into their bag.  
  
Dugan was solid but he'd frozen at the sight of the men that were already dead and Steve needed him to be steady when they made their exit with the living men that wanted them dead.  
  
He was careful with the bundles of explosives but he'd seen them in action and positioned them according to plan.  He paused long enough to cover his mouth and scrape up samples of the dead mutant blood to give to Erskine before Dugan called out for him.  
  
"Let's get out of here," Dugan said, a pistol in each hand and a bulging bag of hopefully important information strapped to his back.  
  
Steve picked up the shield and squared his shoulders for their exit.  "Did you leave the engine running?"  
  
"We're back on track," Dugan said, pointedly not looking down at the dead at his feet when he nodded.  
  
Bucky and Gabe were waiting in the reinforced vehicle buzzing with Stark's best and worst inventions combined into armored speed and luxury.  Steve stayed outside, waiting impatiently until Falsworth and Morita scrambled out of the last building and into the truck.  
  
"Dernier's flare went off on time, he should be waiting at the pickup point," Morita said, leaning against the reinforced window heavily.  
  
"Did you see those things?" Falsworth asked Steve.  
  
Bucky hadn't said a word, silently poking at Steve's uniform instead.  
  
"I got some samples for Dr. Erskine, hopefully he'll know what was done to them so we can avoid it," Steve said.  Bucky pulled a bullet from the fabric and frowned.  
  
"Fancy suit worked out after all, Cap," Jones laughed.  
  
"The shield should have blocked that," Bucky growled.  
  
Dugan floored the truck and pushed a button and the base erupted into fire behind them.  "The shield blocked plenty.  Kid was definitely a Captain tonight."  
  
"We'll debrief later, the mission's still in progress.  Stop poking me, Barnes," Steve added.  
  
But the flames in the mirror did make him go warm inside at the idea that they'd actually pulled this off without casualties.  
  
    ||*||  
  
"Oh no, I didn't sign on for poster-boy, that's all you," Bucky said, holding up his hands when Steve held out the uniform.  
  
Steve frowned.  "Your face isn't plastered all over, I'm doing my part, but we need you to be Captain this time."  
  
"Fucking asshole, you're the Captain," Bucky snapped.  
  
"You're shorter than I am now and I can't fit into the tunnels as easily as you can.  I need to be on extraction.  The plan - "  
  
"You and your plans - this isn't right.  I can't wear the uniform, Steve.  Cap."  
  
"Steve," he said, shoving the uniform into Bucky's metal hand.  "I'm Steve, always to you, Buck.  It's your turn.  We've had three successful missions in three weeks and I'm not going to be the one to break the streak because you don't want to play dress up."  
  
Bucky's nostrils flared.  "The guys won't follow my orders just because I'm wearing a flag."  
  
"They know the plan, I rarely have to give orders in the field because you all know the plan before we go in and adjust accordingly when shit gets bumpy," Steve said.  
  
Bucky clenched his fist in the uniform fabric.  "This isn't your suit."  
  
"No, dummy, it's yours, Howard put holsters for your rifles," Steve snorted.  
  
Bucky considered it.  
  
He rolled his eyes.  "You're such an easy sell when it comes to guns."  
  
"Says the guy who still fights with a trash-can lid before pulling his weapon," Bucky replied.  
  
"The shield is a weapon," Steve replied.  
  
"I'll do it, on one condition.  You keep the shield.  I'll take my guns and the uniform and run point, but the shield isn't Captain America's.  The shield belongs to Steve," Bucky said.  
  
He didn't argue.  He liked his shield.  
  
    ||*||


	4. Chapter 4

He felt like he was 90 lbs and wheezing all over again when it was over.  He didn't think Peggy was laughing out of cruelty but it was clear now that she knew he was inexperienced.  
  
"That was nice, Steve," she said, leaning over to kiss his cheek.  
  
_Nice_.  Sure.  
  
"Hey.  What is it?"  
  
Peggy was one of his best friends and considering they were naked and alone together, he figured honesty would be okay.  
  
"I'm sorry.  Bucky's sister used to say I was the kind of guy that needed to wait until I was married or else my girl would never want to date me after I kissed them," he said.  
  
"You're a great kisser, you just need a little practice with the rest.  And I haven't had that much experience, either, what kind of lady do you take me for?" she smiled.  He relaxed slightly and saw her relax, too.  Okay.  
  
"The kind of lady that deserves the best," he answered.  
  
"Nobody gets to be the best without a few trial runs," she replied.  
  
He pushed himself up so he could relax his wings behind him and took her hand.  "You're beautiful and kind and so much smarter than the bigwigs you have to work for.  I know we don't have time for me to take you out and court you the way you deserve but I hate that our first time fizzled out like a dud.  I've wanted to touch you so long."  He trailed his fingers up her arm.  
  
"The night's not over yet, Steve, and I think I'd like it if you touched me.  Very much," she said.  
  
    ||*||  
  
Steve was sleeping soundly when the shrill ring of the hotel phone brought him slowly out of his dream.  Peggy shifted and he realized it wasn't a dream.  He retracted his wings that had been covering her where the sheets didn't and she yawned at him gratefully as she took the phone.  
  
"Carter.  Howard, it's very late - oh, yes, I may have seen him earlier...thank you.  I'll let him know right away.  I'm not telling you that.  Goodbye, Howard."  She put the phone down heavily and turned to him.  
  
"Are they looking for me?" Steve asked.  
  
"Howard told them you were with his harem and took a message.  Phillips would like to see you," she replied.  
  
Steve snorted.  "He's giving me a bad reputation."  
  
"Nobody believes his stories about you, especially not Phillips," Peggy said, leaning over to kiss him before climbing off the bed to gather her clothes.  "Howard's been a consultant for the SSR for years, but he's only been tolerable since you turned up.  He's always done what he wanted and sometimes it would match up with what we asked for but he's actually working with us now."  
  
Steve hummed thoughtfully.  "People aren't his strong suit.  I think Project Rebirth was the first time he's worked on a human instead a machine.  This war...it hits everyone in a different way."  
  
"You haven't been an experiment to any of us in a long time, Steve.  You're our friend."  
  
Steve slid his legs off the bed and stretched his wings.  "You want to be my girl, Peggy?"  
  
She rolled her eyes at him and tugged on the feathers close enough for her to reach.  "Don't be stupid, Steve, I've been your girl since you kissed me in Italy.  Now get a move on, we shouldn't show up at the same time."  
  
He didn't think there would ever be any question about who was the boss in this relationship.  
  
    ||*||  
  
Monty was waiting for him outside of the hotel.  
  
"Do I need an escort?" he asked, glancing around the quiet streets.  
  
"I hope not, but I need a conversation.  Was the uniform your idea?" Falsworth asked bluntly.  
  
Steve smiled.  "It's finished?  Howard was supposed to show me first."  
  
Falsworth seemed surprised.  "So you did know?  Why - "  
  
"It's not fair that they're flaunting the American flag out there with me and Bucky when our team's made up of so much more.  You didn't even need mad scientists to make you a superhero, Falsworth."  
  
"I'm not a superhero," Falsworth said.  
  
Steve stopped and turned to face him.  "You taught me how to fight, how to keep my cool in a firefight - you're the only reason the Commandos even exist.  You're as much of a superhero as me and Buck.  You don't need wings or a metal arm to win a battle."  
  
Falsworth stared at him.  
  
"I can't give you a higher rank, or a badge or anything to show that you're in charge and you and I both know that sometimes you're in charge," Steve said.  
  
"You * _are_ * still bollocks at remembering politicians' names," Falsworth conceded.  
  
"If you don't want to do it, you don't have to, but I'd like if Union Jack would stand with Captain America at the next press conference we get dragged into.  I'd like the Commandos to be known as more than an American science project."  
  
"Have you spoken to the other men about this?" Falsworth asked.  
  
"Of course, and they already know the hierarchy, this isn't going to change the team, it'll just change how everyone outside sees the team."  He glanced at him seriously.  "They want to start sending us on separate missions now that the team's bigger.  I don't want to take any chances on who runs our missions."  
  
Falsworth reached over and squeezed his shoulder as they walked.  "I see your point, but I can't promise I'll wear the suit if it's as tight as yours."  
  
    ||*||  
  
Months and months of hiding his wings from the enemy and the media became a moot point when Bucky was blasted out of the hatch of the train.  Zola's laugh echoed as he watched him fall, his flesh hand slipping off the railing before Steve had a chance to reach for him.  He didn't hesitate to step out of the moving train and dive after Bucky as his wings split from their harness in preparation for the instant he grabbed Bucky's jacket and looped his arms underneath Bucky's armpits.  They jolted to a stop only feet from the snow-covered rocks as Steve flapped and tried to keep enough momentum to raise them back into the air.  
  
Bucky spat curses and held on tightly, his metal hand bruising his arm but Steve concentrated on getting enough speed to catch up to the train.  
  
"Grab on!" Steve yelled when he finally caught up with the train's open hatch.  
  
"Fuck you!" Bucky yelled back, but he managed to snag the door and swing inside.  He was vaguely aware of gunfire but he heard Bucky's voice through the roar of the snow and train engine an instant before something pierced his wing and sent him into a spiral.  It was pure luck that he was close enough to slam into the train and dig his fingers into the ice.  He heard Bucky yelling his name and managed to claw his way over to the edge.  
  
"STEVE!"  
  
"Give me a hand!" he called and Bucky's metal fingers wrapped around his wrist and yanked him inside with a grunt.  
  
"You stupid motherfucker - what the hell are you thinking - " Bucky demanded, breathless.  
  
"Ow," Steve answered, pain shooting up his left wing when he tried to tuck in.  He was relieved that the rat of a doctor was tied up at the other end of the train car.  The man's eyes were wide as he stared at his wings.  
  
"Are you - Steve, say something," Bucky grabbed him by the chin.  "You're - "  
  
His vision was spotty and his lungs hurt - everything hurt and he couldn't breathe - this wasn't asthma -  
  
"Steve, Steve, let me see - " Bucky wavered in front of him.  
  
His wing wasn't the only part of him that had taken a bullet.  Howard would be so disappointed in his body armor if he found out.  
  
"Hang on, just, Steve - goddammit - "  
  
The black spots were thicker now and lasted longer but he glimpsed Zola moving behind Bucky and scrabbled his hand down Bucky's side until he wrapped his fingers around a pistol and shoved Bucky aside in time to fire a shot and splatter the bastard's brains on the wall.  
  
He managed a single breath before everything spun into black.  
  
    ||*||

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I only have vague comic knowledge but Wikipedia, et al, says that Monty was an epic fighter and a superhero in his own right. *pets him*.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for coming along for the ride! Finale next week, or sooner if I can pull it together the way I want.

"Oh thank God."  
  
He sucked in a breath and jolted, his hands clenching but restrained to keep him from fighting whatever was stabbing in his chest.  
  
"Hey - hey, Rogers, look up, you're fine, you're good, look up, yeah, good," Morita's voice was steadier than Steve's vision but he managed to recognize and focus on him.  "You're scaring the hell out of us, Boss, and we really need you to take a breath or two now that they've pulled that bullet out of your lung."  
  
He relaxed slightly when he saw Dugan at his side holding his arm.  
  
"Where - "  
  
"No questions, just breathing, Sarge and Monty are handling everything, you just have to hang on so your girl doesn't kill us all," Morita said.  
  
His vision faded but Morita's voice broke through the gray.  "Hang on, Rogers - pull that tube out, asshole, before he heals around it - "  
  
There was a sharp stab of pain and then - air finally filled his lungs.  "Ow, stop - " he managed.  
  
"Just relax, Rogers, they're patching you up, try and stay still.  We don't know what happened out there but it's all okay now that you've got your eyes open," Dugan said.  
  
It probably wasn't a good thing that he couldn't keep them open any longer.  
  
    ||*||  
  
 _"I don't consider this mission a failure with all the intel we got off the bastard_."  Bucky.  
  
 _"Dr. Zola -_ " Phillips.  
  
" _Would only have spouted lies if he still lived_."  Erskine.  
  
There were lots of people in this room.  Someone was touching his left wing.  It hurt.  Everything hurt.  
  
"Steve?"  Peggy's voice was a balm over his confusion.  
  
He blinked and regretted it immediately when the light blinded him.  
  
"Steven, how do you feel?" Dr. Erskine's hand patted his cheek and caught his attention before he could check the pain in his chest and his wing.  
  
"Sore, what happened?" Steve asked.  Peggy brazenly laced her fingers with his and he wondered how bad it really was.  
  
"What do you remember?" Bucky asked, dragging his attention to the opposite side of the bed.  
  
"You fell off a train.  Zola shot me, you saved me.  I shot Zola," Steve counted off.  Bucky visibly exhaled.  "I couldn't breathe."  
  
Phillips grunted.  "Why'd you shoot Zola, Rogers?"  
  
"Bucky pulled me in and Zola was tied up.  I don't think he knew I had wings but I couldn't breathe or talk.  He had one of those guns that shoot blue and I took Bucky's gun and shot him - I couldn't yell out because I couldn't talk," Steve said, wincing at the memory.  
  
"I didn't know Zola had the gun," Bucky said.  
  
"They found a HYDRA weapon on the train, Jones had it in his report," Peggy added.  
  
Phillips sighed.  "Fair enough.  As long as nobody on your team is going off-plan..."  
  
"Off-plan?" Steve coughed.  "I didn't even tie Zola up before I jumped out after Bucky, at least he contained him alive before he got me back.  You should be commending him for his priorities..."  
  
"Shh," Bucky said, glancing at Dr. Erskine and then glaring at Phillips.  "Can you go bother someone else a few hours before you rile him up?"  
  
"I'll sign off on the reports since your stories match up.  Get it on paper as soon as he's up to it, Carter," Phillips said, standing up.  He looked down at him.  "Glad you're not dead, Rogers."  
  
"He's as charming as always," Peggy muttered.  He turned toward her and she squeezed his hand.  She was carefully cleaning his bloody and charred feathers with her other hand.  
  
"You are very lucky," Erskine said.  "You were shot in the left wing and in the chest.  The serum couldn't keep the bullets from penetrating the body, but it kept them from punching through.  Since the bullets were removed, you've been recovering at a remarkable rate."  
  
Bucky leaned forward and laid his head on Steve's arm.  "You don't get to do that.  You were dying.  You don't..."  
  
"You fell out of the train," Steve replied.  
  
Bucky choked out a laugh, or a sob, it was hard to tell.  
  
"We're all irrationally angry with you right now, Steve," Peggy said softly.  "You carry a shield, you're not supposed to *be* the shield."  
  
"I didn't get shot on purpose," Steve replied.  "Did you drug me?"  
  
"Tried, the serum burned through the anesthetics but you were down for the most part," Erskine said.  
  
"Fought like we were trying to rip your wings off," Bucky said, not raising his head from Steve's arm.  "Weren't listening to anybody."  
  
"You fell off a train," Steve repeated.  "Didn't really care about anything else, just saw you fall."  
  
Bucky choked again and it was definitely a sob.  "Oh, Steve, what the hell…"  
  
"That's in the past now and you're on the mend.  We'll talk about the rest later.  You're going to stay here until Dr. Erskine clears you completely.  Promise me," Peggy said sternly.  
  
"He promises.  I'm not leaving," Bucky said.  Peggy nodded and leaned over for a chaste kiss on his cheek before taking her leave.  
  
"I'm starving," Steve said, sinking into the bed.  
  
"You threw up a lot of blood," Bucky whispered.  
  
"We'll get you a hearty meal when your stats level out.  And more blankets," Erskine called to what he assumed were nurses or lab techs out of his sight.  "We're all glad you're back with us, Steven."  
  
He turned his hand to strum at Bucky's mussed hair finding it stiff with blood.  "Did you get hurt, Buck?"  
  
"You _broke_ my _fucking_ heart.  All the blood is yours, or Zola's."  He raised his head to search Steve's face.  "We need to talk, so fucking much, Steve.  You're sending money to my Mom, putting me down in your will - I've got people asking me for permission to cut you open - "  
  
Steve didn't know why all this was suddenly news.  "I thought you knew.  You're my family, since my mom died - "  
  
"I can't watch you die.  I won't let you…this isn't right.  You can't - Steve, I need you to be okay so I can yell at you."  
  
"I'm okay, Buck."  
  
"Close your eyes and shut up," Bucky sighed.  "Please."  
  
He decided to listen and pretend like Bucky wasn't crying into his shoulder.  
  
    ||*||  
  
"Steady - Doc, are you sure he's okay for this?"  
  
"Bucky, he said I was fine," Steve sighed, but he's grateful for being allowed to sit up - he'd be overjoyed if they let him stand.  
  
Dr. Erskine moved over and checked the stitches that were already unnecessary but insisted on by Bucky.  "I assure you, James, it will be better for his health, and his friends' mental health, if he gets on his feet as soon as possible.  Your only concern right now is keeping his wing completely immobilized."  
  
Steve's wing wasn't healing as fast as the rest of his body.  The wound had repaired itself but it had been three days and he only had fluffy down feathers instead of the sturdy adult feathers necessary for flight.  
  
"Yeah, your secret's not a secret anymore.  They had a press team waiting for your capture of the rogue Nazi scientist and instead they got all the film of you bleeding out on the train platform at full wingspan," Bucky said.  
  
Steve's heart sank.  Oh no.  
  
"Don't make that face," Bucky said.  "It's not that bad.  I put on the stupid uniform and gave speeches and Monty and Peggy stepped up to defend keeping it secret."  
  
"Where are we?" Steve asked.  He didn't want to think about the backlash.  
  
"Switzerland, temporarily.  It's a secret base but we're due in London and there will be lots of photographers."  Bucky hesitated.  "I'm going to be really sorry if they excommunicate you, but I didn't talk to the priests."  
  
Steve laughed despite himself, his hand going to the stitches automatically and snapping Bucky from his moment of not worrying.  
  
"Thanks, Bucky.  That was probably best," Steve said.  
  
"I expect you back in four hours for me to check your wing," Dr. Erskine said, making a 'shoo' motion with his hands.  
  
"Seriously, how bad is it going to be?  If you gave speeches - " Steve said when they stepped into the hallway.  
  
"I had help with that part," Bucky said.  
  
"You're an asshole," Gabe said, turning the corner and pointing at him accusingly.  "You're not allowed to get shot on our watch - you are in so much shit, Rogers," he continued until he pulled him into a rough hug.  
  
"Watch the wing, Jones," Bucky scolded.  
  
Gabe pulled back.  "You scared the hell out of us, Cap."  
  
"It wasn't on purpose, I promise," Steve said.  
  
Gabe rolled his eyes.  "The rest of the guys are waiting outside, they've got a massive spread of food for you."  
  
His stomach growled on cue and Bucky snickered.  "We'll meet you, go warn the guys to lay off his wings, the rest of him is okay, but not the feathers."  
  
"Got it.  Damn glad to see you back, Steve," Gabe said.  
  
Bucky turned to him suddenly.  "He was pretty shaken up when we got to the station, everyone was but he was on the train and didn't know what happened.  The plan wasn't solid so go easy on him when you talk to him.  Monty's pissed off he was running another mission and everybody's spitting mad at your handlers bringing in that news crew unannounced."  
  
"Thanks for the warning."  
  
"Yeah.  And I'm mad for a bunch of other reasons.  You will never, and I mean *never* ask me to make your medical decisions for you.  I can't, I won't ever make the call for them to unplug you - they had to shock you back to life, Steve.  Don't ever make me do that again."  
  
"I'm still here so it seems like you did a good job," Steve said.  
  
"I'm actually a little happy that your wing's going to keep you grounded," Bucky said.  "Let's go get you fed and scolded proper."  
  
    ||*||  
  



	6. Chapter 6

"Howard, I need your brain," Steve said, finding his friend passed out at his desk with lab techs working around his puddle of drool.  
  
Howard smiled sleepily, but Steve didn't smell fresh alcohol on him so he hoped he'd picked a good moment.  "What's on your mind, buddy?"  
  
"I think I found a cipher in Zola's notes but I need a second opinion," Steve said.  
  
Howard wrinkled his forehead.  "Don't we have codebreakers for that?"  
  
Steve frowned.  "I don't know them, I know you.  And if I'm right, I don't want the SSR taking over this mission."  
  
"You're still grounded because of your wing.  Let me see," Howard said, holding out his hand for the pages.  
  
Steve passed over his notes and poured Howard a cup of coffee to grease his mental wheels before joining him at the desk.  
  
Howard's eyes slowly widened as he flipped through the pages before he let them slip out of his fingers and met Steve's gaze.  "Steve."  
  
"I know."  
  
"Schmidt is going for New York," Howard said.  
  
Steve didn't want to believe it but if Howard saw it, too…  
  
He shook off his panic and tapped at the notes again.  "But the coordinates to the base, they're with the same cipher so we can find it, right?  We can stop it."  
  
Howard hesitated but steadied himself in an instant with a nod.  "Yes.  We're damned well going to stop it.  I'll do everything I can to get you back in the air so - "  
  
"I don't need wings to take out Schmidt; get as many details as you can on the plane he's using to carry the bombs, and bring out the best weapons you're squirreling away for the big hit," Steve said.  
  
Howard smirked.  "Bring me everything you have from Zola, if he's as smart as me or Erskine, he'll have notes scribbled on everything."  
  
"Nobody's as smart as you, Howard, it's just unfortunate your ego matches the size of your IQ," Steve said, clapping him on the back.  
  
    ||*||  
  
"This is the stupidest plan yet," Bucky said.  
  
Steve smiled.  "I think it's, kind of, fantastic."  
  
They looked out over the Commandos and hand-picked soldiers all dressed in Captain America uniforms.  Some had fabricated wings and metallic arm gauntlets.  And every detachable piece would explode within 30 seconds of being unhooked.  Most of them would reveal other Allied country's flags, too.  Monty even had on the Captain America suit and wouldn't show Union Jack until the initial ambush was made.  
  
HYDRA wouldn't know what hit them.  
  
Peggy's heels caught his attention and they both turned when she stepped in.  Steve laughed in surprise at her tailored red, white and blue uniform.  
  
"Can you believe Howard tried to make me wear a skirt?  Honestly," Peggy said, flushing when Steve dared a kiss on her cheek.  
  
"How are we on time?" Steve asked.  
  
"Waiting on your inspirational speech, Captain," she said.  
  
"Better be a doozy this time, Steve.  A lot of those guys are going to be pissed if they die wearing this outfit," Bucky said.  
  
    ||*||  
  
Steve glimpsed rows of men lurking in the surrounding trees as his motorcycle barrelled down the dirt trail toward what would hopefully be the last HYDRA base they ever saw.  He held his breath and braced himself as he hit the gas.  
  
Shields flew from all directions, blasting out guard towers around the perimeter as the motorcycle smashed through the doors.  He flipped off the bike and it slammed into one of the buildings and exploded with a boom that took his hearing for the first round of attackers.  
  
Captain Americas flooded the base and flashes of fire and sound turned everything to chaos - just like he planned.  Men glided into the fray on explosive winged parachutes and things got even louder.  
  
He settled his senses during a momentary pause between buildings and heard the sound of a plane engine.  
  
Oh no - it was too soon for Schmidt to have the plane ready to go.  This wasn't like they planned at all.  
  
"Cap!  Do you hear that?" Bucky called, only slightly out of breath when he reached his side.  
  
"We have to find that plane," Steve said.  Bucky nodded and they took off toward the sound.  
  
It was already in motion when they found the runway and Steve knew they couldn't make it on foot.  
  
"No!" Bucky yelled.  
  
A car squealed around the corner and Steve spotted it first, Peggy's hair instead of the flashy uniform catching his attention and he grabbed Bucky and they both leaped into the car before she floored it to chase down the plane.  
  
"As soon as she gets to the edge - I need you to throw me, as high as you can!" he yelled over the noise.  
  
"What the - "  
  
"Tailwind!" Steve yelled, fighting the speed and standing up.  He didn't hear any more objections before he pushed off and prayed for his busted wing to catch enough of the air for one more flight.  
  
    ||*||  
  
 _"Sarge!"_  
  
 _"Bucky!"_  
  
 _"Where's Cap?  Agent Carter said - "_  
  
Bucky slammed the door to shut out the questions.  He knew they were worried but fuck them - "Howard - "  
  
"I'm working on it, don't talk to me," Howard said.  
  
Peggy wouldn't meet his eyes and he didn't want to think about the streaks of tears and wet spot on Morita's shoulder.  
  
He'd heard enough of the transmission from Phillips' office to not ask questions.  
  
"Howard."  
  
"I have trackers, all the Commandos have them, something Steve asked for after your first few missions," Howard said, tapping keys faster than Bucky could read.  
  
"What kind of trackers?" Morita asked.  
  
"Dog tags, mostly," Howard muttered.  
  
"But Steve - " Peggy shuddered, moving to Bucky's side.  
  
"Steve doesn't wear dog tags, they're in *somebody's* jewelry box in London," Howard said, not looking away from the radar screens.  "But he does carry one thing with him, always."  
  
"We don't know if the shield - " Bucky whispered, pretending like he didn't feel Peggy's fingers clenching his metal wrist tightly.  
  
"Not that - his church thing, his rosary," Howard replied absently.  "Come on you lazy thing, come on..."  
  
"You put a tracker on his rosary?" Peggy asked.  
  
"Blasphemy, sure, but Erskine's Jewish and I'm long hellbound so yes, we put a tracker on his rosary," Howard said.  "There."  
  
A cluster of green dots appeared onscreen and Howard pointed.  "The Commandos."  He pointed to a single one a few clicks apart.  "Erskine."  
  
"Where's Steve?" Bucky asked, searching the screen.  
  
Morita pushed past them to a different screen and jabbed his finger toward a dot as the line of the radar circled painfully slowly before blinking again.  "There - he's still moving."  
  
"But the plane already went down," Peggy said.  
  
"He's in the ocean.  No telling where the blast would have landed him.  He could be caught in a current," Howard realized.  
  
"How fast can you get us there, Stark?" Bucky asked.  
  
"Not fast enough, Peggy, can you get Phillips to - "  
  
She let go of Bucky's wrist and squared her shoulders.  "We're cleared for whatever resources we need, we have planes fueling now."  
  
"Might need a sub if those coordinates are right," Morita murmured.  "Shit."  
  
    ||*||  
  
"I hate boats.  Hate subs, but not as much as boats.  Hate planes now, too.  I think I'm going to buy a bicycle," Bucky grumbled through his chapped lips.  He needed more layers.  
  
"You could go below where it's warm and stare at the monitors like everyone else," Peggy said, her eyes barely visible through the furry hood on her parka.  
  
"It's been a month," Bucky said.  
  
"Yes."  
  
"He couldn't survive."  
  
"No."  
  
"I'm not giving up on him," Bucky said.  
  
"Nobody is."  
  
The hatch slammed open and Howard skidded onto the deck.  "We need a boat."  
  
"We're on a boat, Howard," Peggy pointed out.  
  
"A dinghy, or a raft - hell, give me a life preserver and I'll swim it," Howard said, panicked as he ran to the railing as the boat's engines powered down.  
  
"What the hell is - " Bucky started but Peggy's eyes widened behind her fur and she pointed.  
  
A hand, blue and stiff with ice was reaching out of the water several yards away, grasping for ice to pull himself out before sinking out of sight again.  
  
"Oh, fuck, he's still alive - " Howard whispered.  
  
Bucky didn't remember snapping the cables on the dinghy or pushing anyone out of the way - everything was white noise until he was on the water paddling with everything he had.  
  
The hand rose again and Bucky grabbed it, yanking with all his strength until Steve - God - it was Steve - had his head above water.  
  
"Wings - don't float - " Steve gasped, struggling to pull himself with Bucky's help into the boat.  
  
"Fuck - Steve, are you - "  
  
Steve flopped over on his back, his chest heaving.  He pushed Bucky's hands away at first and then gasped, water rushing from his mouth into the bottom of the boat.  "Fuck..."  
  
Steve's lips were blue - his eyelashes were layered with frost and his wings dead weight with ice behind him.  There was no way he should be alive.  
  
Bucky's eyes finally landed on Steve's chest - his sides were moving, expanding like his chest and he reached down to touch his side.  
  
Bucky pulled back the torn cloth to reveal neat flaps of skin fluttering with every breath.  Gills.  
  
"Guess I'm going to have to learn how to swim, Buck," Steve said.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> :D This was fun. *checks box*


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Considering how much I've been writing, it's very sad how little I've posted/updated lately. But this 'verse lives on in my imagination so here are some pieces of this one. Hopefully it will bring me inspiration on bridging this into the rest of the pieces I have for this one.

"Everybody just stop!" Peggy whistled and the panicked crew froze in place. "Jenkins, get on the radio and call in, have the captain plot the fastest course back to port. Howard, get your scientists to put all their focus into treatment for hypothermia and frostbite."

"Blankets, and we'll need to warm him up before we can cut his clothes off," Bucky said. Steve's strength seemed to drain out of him after his short stint of speaking but he was breathing - sort of - and they had time now.

God - Steve - he made it. They both fucking made it. Even if he had to dig a pond for the bastard, Steve was alive.

They got him on a stretcher and hauled him below deck and onto a platform intended for his dead body and not his breathing one. Bucky made sure he was near his head and caught his dazed attention. "Hey, Steve, hey, can you look at me? How do you feel?"

"That's a dumb question. Have you seen Ma?" Steve asked in a slow voice. Oh no.

"We found you, Stevie, you're safe now," Bucky said. "We'll get you warmed up and we'll talk it through."

Peggy moved to Bucky's side but her eyes were drawn to the gills exposed from earlier before locking eyes with Steve. God, he was nearly a skeleton. "Hey."

"Peggy...I like this dream," Steve smiled faintly.

"Blankets, as many as you can find," Peggy said and a mountain of covers came their way and she went to work arranging them over him.

"Cold," Steve said, his eyelids sliding closed.

"Oh no, Stevie, you're going to be awake for this, come on, buddy," Bucky urged, putting his flesh hand against his frigid cheek.

"Wings. Heavy," Steve murmured.

"The feathers are going to break if we don't defrost him slowly," one of the techs said.

"They're going to fall out anyway, they're too damaged," another spoke.

"'S'okay. They'll grow back. Didn't want to grow fins," Steve said. "Make a feather blanket."

"He's delirious but God knows he's earned it," Peggy shuddered.

"Just getting that now? We got any coffee, hot soup or something we can make him drink?" Bucky asked.

"Let's give him some space, you and you, stay and check things, everybody else get to work packing up and staying the hell out of the way, we're making double time to get him to Erskine," Howard said. "Hook this up, we'll use it on his wings."

Bucky stared at the hair dryer in his hand. "Where did you get that?"

"He doesn't like going out with a wet mustache," Steve said, blinking at him owlishly. "Hey. You found me."

Bucky stifled his relieved sob when Steve turned his attention back to him. "Bucky. Oh my God, I can't swim for shit," he said, reaching out from the blankets to clasp his fingers in his jacket. Bucky caught his freezing hand and held on.

"We kind of figured that out when it took this long to find you," Howard chimed in.

"Steve. What happened?" Peggy asked, wiping the water from his defrosting eyelashes from his cheeks.

Steve shivered but his eyes were more lucid. "My wings were busted after the fight. I had to fight Red Skull to get control but - I had to put it in the water and I - something hit me across my head when the plane crashed. I woke up, underwater, don't know how long ago. Didn't feel like that long, but my wings were dead weight and I couldn't get to the light."

"How long, Steve, I know you're technical with time, you know how long," Howard interrupted. "When did you wake up?"

Steve shivered again. "194 hours and 46 minutes since I started the count."

"Thank God, shit," Howard hissed out.

"I know that probably feels like forever, Steve, and I'm so sorry it took this long, but it's been a month and three days the crash," Peggy said.

"Oh. Wow," Steve said.

"It doesn't matter, you're here now and we're going on leave as soon as you can walk and breathe with your mouth and not your gills," Bucky said.

"Gills?" Howard asked.

"I don't want to be a mermaid, I don't - are my toes webbed now? How bad is it?" Steve asked, his eyes glazing slightly with alarm. "I don't know how to swim - "

"Shh," Peggy quieted him with a touch to his lips. "You're okay now, Steve. Rest, we're not going anywhere."

"And you won't make me swim," Steve said.

"Promise," Peggy said. "We will, at some point, expect you to shower, but no swimming."

* * *

"We can be done now, right? The SSR wanted HYDRA burned to the ground and we've done that - can he go home now?" Bucky asked Peggy when Erskine had locked them out of the lab.

Peggy hesitated. "I'm not actually in charge, Barnes. The SSR would very much like you both back in the field to put out the leftover HYDRA brushfires but with Steve's...health as a factor, I've managed to put them off for now."

Bucky sighed. "He's too skinny."

"A month without food will do that to you," Peggy murmured absently.

"Considering I'm his power of attorney," Bucky still winced when he thought of it. "Can you tell me the length of his contract?"

"Five years. He extended it when he was working out deals for the Commandos," Peggy said, avoiding his gaze. "He has four more years to go, and that's if they count the time he was lost at sea."

"Jesus," Bucky said. "I need to get him a lawyer..."

"As much as he talks about making plans, he's pretty impulsive when it comes to himself," Peggy frowned. "I don't think he expected to go back to Brooklyn, even before they had him doing propaganda, with the wings."

"Stupid. Brooklyn's holding candlelight vigils twice a week," Bucky snorted.

"It's his decision. Even with HYDRA gone, there are other threats that we could use him, and you, to fight," Peggy said. "Your contract's open-ended, part of his deal, for all of you. If you ever want him back in civvies, you probably shouldn't leave him alone to sign paperwork again."

Bucky studied her. "You're sticking with him, though, right?"

"Until I'm reassigned," Peggy replied. "Things will change after the war is over."

"Steve won't let it," Bucky said.

Peggy caught his gaze. "He'll be back on his feet and we'll have plenty of time to discuss it then."

The lock clicked and Dr. Erskine stepped out.

"How is he?" Bucky asked immediately.

"He will recover. His body has...evolved and it's going to take time for him to adjust to breathing normal oxygen. I'll need more time to monitor his recovery before I can determine his fitness for duty," Dr. Erskine said. "There's so much we can learn..."

"He's not an experiment," Peggy said sharply and the doctor flushed.

"That's not what I meant, of course," Dr. Erskine said. "We'll take him back to New York where my lab is fully equipped. Howard's already convinced him to stay in one of his mansions in the city so he'll have privacy and won't be on base."

Bucky almost laughed at the 'mansion in the city' part. He was going to drag the flying bastard back to Brooklyn the first chance he got so he would remember that he had a home waiting for him.


End file.
